Some would say that this has been another week of the plateau, wherein Mom didn’t make many changes, or slip one way or t’other. I disagree, but with reservations. You see, Lazarina has surprised us so many times that I’m not going to put my eggs back into the basket - so to speak. However, every morning, now, I awaken and make sure my phone is with me - no matter where - I just can’t let go of the idea that we’re coming closer to the book’s final remarks.
This week Mom ate very little. There wasn’t a single meal in which she ate more than 20%, and that was a lot! In fact, according to those who have been observing her this week, it’s been more 5%, and that’s with the shake and yogurt. So, tell me something different.
She has been staying slightly hydrated, though. She drinks a little coffee, and, perhaps, one or two glasses of juice - but they keep on her to encourage her to have more - but she declines, politely, and really has no interest.
Now, one would assume, with her shake she would be getting more - but no - she takes a sip, then puts it down; this, too, means staff has to keep encouraging her, but it’s becoming more discouraging as she simply states, “No thank you. I don’t want anymore.”
She has been sleeping more and more this week. Yesterday, she arose for less than an hour and had a little juice (less than a glass) and then went back to bed.
Even Jean noticed the change!
Dear Tony,
I missed Connie's conversation today, more with my Norma-visit, as she was so unresponsive. I got there at 12:20, and saw her sitting at the table with a full plate of lunch in front of her. She was wearing that pretty blue/gray/green Paisley print shirt with light blue pants. As usual, she was wearing her support hose; I'm always glad to see that.
I greeted the other ladies at the table: Dorothy, Lucille, two I did not know. I started to feed Norma what looked like a tuna-veggie dish,with chopped carrots on the side, and rice. I alternated giving her the protein drink and the main dish; no expression either way, but at least she did eat. The coffee cup was half full; she had sips of that, holding the cup herself. She had drunk half the red juice.
I told Norma that Connie went to the seminary tea; that Mary Rose was on the committee, and that daughter Ann was taking her mother. "Have you ever been to the Portland Gold Club?" I asked; no response there. After a while, I asked if she would like her coffee heated up a bit. "That would not be bad," she said (I think).
The caregivers were busy helping other ladies, I'm glad I could be there at mealtime.
Norma seemed to be comfortable, but quiet and uninterested in her surroundings. I painted her fingernails with the pink polish; I held her hands then and continued to hold one at a time. She accepted that, and at times held one of my hands. I was glad to accept her friendly touch.
I brought the little orange I'd peeled at home. Three weeks ago she ate all the segments;last two times she ate them only when I put them up to her lips. She ate half the chocolate bar. The other half was still there when I took my leave an hour later. I told her Connie and I would be back in a few days.
Norma was one sleepy lady after a while, left hand leaning on her face, and appearing to be asleep.
Hardly a word escaped her lips today. She did not seem to be trying to say something, but it's a mystery what goes on in her mind. I hope she's not feeling frustrated at times, but just calmly going along with things.
Have you seen evidence that she's frustrated or struggling for words to offer her thoughts? That darn dementia takes away so much; I hope that loss is not painful or even known.
I hope you find her perkier next time you see her.
God bless,
Jean
So, it’s not something only I have seen.
When I checked in today, I asked the resident manager if he’s noticed anything - his opinion was that Mom was close, but not to place any bets, as we know what she’s done in the past.
When I entered, Leddy and Iofina were changing Mom and getting her ready to come out. That lasted only a few minutes, as Mom then went right back to sleep and wasn’t easily roused. So, we kept her in bed, fully dressed.
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| Napping - I had asked her to smile, but she decided to sleep it off... |
I put on the soundtrack for Band of Brothers which she told me she liked. I thought if music were playing it might trigger something. While I watched her doze, I read from my kindle, silently. I noticed her hand was shaking uncontrollably, but my touch did nothing to stop it.
I offered her some juice after I’d opened the curtains, and she took it, stating, “This is refreshing!” She drank a small amount, and later she had more. At last, she said she was ready to get up - but when Iofina came in and began the process she tried to change her mind.
As they lifted her to her Geri Chair, it struck me how frail and disabled she has become. Her legs sagged as though they were pendulous appendages with no purpose. Once in the chair, they moved her out into the dining hall.
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| Mom finally got up - and this is the smile she managed...She approved this snap. |
Mom had her juice, which she had a bit more of, and then they gave her some coffee. She kept staring off into space. When I asked what she was looking at she stayed in her trance, or just turned her head and looked at me stoically.
Finally, it was time for me to take my leave as Mom put her head on her hand and drifted back to sleep.
There really is no longer much of the woman I have known for 57 years+ (we do need to include womb-time). As I observed her sleeping, I noticed the chin, strong as her determination; her eyes, questioning and probing; her breath, restful and comfortable. Her hair had a curl to it - apparently Linn has her magical methods to provide this for her. She lay straight out - not how I remember from past years when she would curl up - I’ve not seen that for some time now.
We all change, but seeing it with your parents or siblings can be something to behold and ponder.
So much to consider and think about.
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